Carl's Jr. Truck @ SchoolsFirst's Shred Day - Tustin
Three things blew my mind last week. First was that Susan Boyle YouTube video, which I haven't been able to stop watching. Second was Jonathan Gold's latest opus on something I wouldn't have thought any food critic, let alone one with a Pulitzer Prize, would touch: corporate-branded fast-food. More specifically, Carl's Jr.
What prompted L.A. Weekly's esteemed critic, known to delve the depths of the interesting and unexplored, to write an instant classic on the virtues of Carl's Jr.'s Six Dollar Burger? Well, it's Padma Lakshmi. Or more precisely, her cleavage and other comely assets, featured in a Carl's TV ad that already had tongues wagging in more ways than one.
Mr. Gold's article, my friends, is even better than the commercial -- a titillating read that puts new meaning on food porn, veering dangerously into Penthouse Forum territory, and that's only when he was talking about the burger.
Here's a choice quote:
"She hikes up her dress when it appears that the hamburger is about to spurt, and she tongues the viscous fluids from her wrist and her lips, leaving conspicuous evidence of the money shot streaked on her glistening cheek."So what was the third thing that blew my mind?
Well, serendipitously, after I read Mr. Gold's article, I found out that SchoolsFirst (formerly Orange County Teachers Federal Credit Union) was holding an event called Shred Day on Saturday at its Tustin administrative offices, wherein you get to haul out two boxes worth of documents, get it shredded for free, AND as a reward for coming, receive a Carl's Jr. lunch, complete with fries and a fountain drink.
Some days, the stars align. In this case, Famous Stars! And they were free, served from their mobile unit and eaten in the beautiful outdoors (okay, it was picnic tables in a parking lot), while a souped-up garbage truck turned mountains of paper into confetti.
So, how did I like my burger? It was fine, thanks. Slightly smoky, messy, and drippy just like they always say it is. And the fries were much better than I remember, halfway between regular fast-food french fries and steak fries.
Me? I'm more of a Western Bacon Cheeseburger guy, even before the Padma commercial. But it's a fast-food indulgence that I haven't had in a long time, since immediately after consuming one with my usual gusto, I'm usually racked with guilt that I just ate something very, very good, which is also very, very bad. And now, after Mr. Gold's review, something a little pervy too.
THIS WEEK ON OC WEEKLY:
The Dock - Newport Beach